Snack Time - TJ’s Gluten Free Muffins
Look, I didn’t set out to make this a “Trader Joe’s Recommendation” newsletter but…Joe knows his snacks.
Today I’m recommending you buy a pack of the Gluten Free Muffins. Yes, gluten free. There are coffee cake ones, chocolate one, and a new triple ginger variety. And they are the softest, moistest, most delicious baked goods.
Every time I check out, the checker says “HAVE YOU TRIED THESE I DON’T EVEN EAT GLUTEN FREE AND THEY ARE SO DELICIOUS.” I just nod knowingly. Soon you can too.
Careers I’m Considering
Coming back to the office after the Holidays and remote work has been… a struggle. I’m not a huge fan of my day job to begin with, but after a few weeks of living my best life (making jewelry, playing housewife, and reading books), returning to an empty cement room in an empty building on an empty canvas and spending the whole day replying to questions sent by people who didn’t bother to read the email… oof! I really want to quit!
But, unfortunately, I do need to pay rent, and I do want health insurance. Personally, I feel like I should be paid just for existing as a mostly functional adult because that’s hard enough, but that’s not going to happen, so I need to continue having a job.
In theory, my job should be fine. It’s consistent, I have good benefits, and it’s not so taxing that I don’t have energy. It’s been a job where I tell myself “just work here while you’re in grad school” and “just work here while you launch your screenwriting career.” However, I’m not in grad school anymore and as of right now, my screenwriting career is going nowhere (especially since I’ve done no screenwriting since graduating and seem to have a complete mental block against it and feel like my screenwriting self is a completely different person who’s stopped talking to me and wonder daily why I got an MFA at all if I was just going to drop all endeavors as soon as I graduate and yes I will be talking to my therapist about all of this but also help).
The answer, of course, would be to look for a new job. But what kind of a job? My skills are related to marketing, PR, communications, and community engagement, but I feel like it’s hard to see that on my resume despite my best efforts. Entry-level writing gigs wouldn’t even cover my rent. I just want insurance (including vision), a flexible schedule, lots of PTO, to work from home, and work for a company that doesn’t make me feel like I’m working for the devil. Is that too hard to ask?
Anyway, here’s some careers I think would be the right fit:
Author, but someone else does query letters for me and I need am advance to cover living expenses until I finish writing the novel
Columnist, a la Carrie Bradshaw, a career which I’m pretending still exists.
Socialite, who has a mysterious money source, so mysterious I don’t even know what it would be.
Full-time crafter, perhaps vintage/second-hand reseller. There is no evidence that this could actually sustain my whole career.
Influencer, a thing I cannot actually imagine myself doing but think about all the time as my goal in life is to be paid for doing the stuff I like doing. But I’m bad at self-promotion, never take pictures or video of myself, and would probably be too boring to gather enough interest. I can’t even bring myself to consider making a subscriber option for this newsletter, or opening a Patreon. But if you see me making a bunch of TikToks next week… know I’ve officially become desperate.
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Quotes from Rankin/Bass Stop-Motion Christmas Specials That Last Year Round
“I’m a MAN now, Tanta.” - Santa Claus is Coming to Town
“I’m cuuuuuuute. She said I’m cuuuuuuuuute!” Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
“This is man’s work.” - Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
“Bumbles bounce!” - Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
“Here he comes now, the big ham.” - The Year Without a Santa Claus
“I’m in-de-pen-dent!” - Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
“It’s a baby BABY, Bingle!” - Santa Claus is Coming to Town
“I’m too much.” - The Year Without a Santa Claus